Teaching empathy to young children - post

What is #empathy, and what does it look like in young children?

Empathy is not just saying “sorry.” It is understanding feelings and choosing a helpful action.

You might see empathy when a child:

• Brings a friend a toy or blanket
• Says, “Are you okay?”
• Looks worried when someone cries
• Offers a hug (if the other child wants one)
• Gets an adult to help

Remember: empathy grows slowly. A #toddler may notice a friend is upset but still grab the toy. That does not mean they are “mean.” It means they need coaching.

Why does empathy #matter in child care and #preschool?

Empathy helps children do well in a group. It supports:

• Friendships and teamwork
• Fewer hurtful words and actions
• Better problem-solving
• A calmer #classroom 

It also helps children feel #safe and cared for. When kids feel understood, they #learn better. 

How do children learn empathy from adults?

Children learn empathy the same way they learn #language: by hearing it and seeing it again and again.

Try these adult habits:

• Name feelings out loud. “You look sad.” “You seem excited!”
• Show gentle care. Speak softly, get down to their level, offer help.
• Use #respectful words. Children copy the tone and words you use.
• Talk about your own feelings. “I feel frustrated. I’m going to take a deep breath.”

If you want a deeper look at social-emotional #growth (including compassion and kindness), this ChildCareEd course can help: Brighter Futures: Social Emotional Development

What are easy daily routines that build empathy?

You do not need a “special empathy lesson” every day. Small routines work best.

1) Feelings check-in (1 minute)
At circle time, ask:

• “How do you feel today?”
• “Show me with your face.”
• “Do you want a calm body or a moving body?”

2) Notice-and-name
During play, narrate what you see:

• “Lina is smiling. She likes that game.”
• “Omar is covering his ears. It’s too loud.”

3) Kind helper jobs
Give children jobs that help others:

• Line leader
• Snack helper
• “Friendship helper” (passes out materials, invites others to play)

4) “We take care of each other” rules
Keep rules short and positive:

• “Hands are for helping.”
• “We use kind words.”
• “We listen when someone says stop.” 

What activities help children practice empathy during play?

Kids learn best through play, stories, and #pretend.

Try these ideas:

• Puppet feelings: Use two puppets and act out a simple problem. Ask, “How does the puppet feel?”
• Role-play helping: Practice phrases like “Do you need help?” and “You can have a turn after me.”
• Picture #books: Pause and ask, “What is the character feeling? How do you know?”
• Partner games: Simple games where children take turns and cheer for each other.

Want a classroom focus on social skills and caring community? This course is a great match: Supporting Social Learning: Creating Classrooms that Care

How can you coach empathy during conflicts (without long lectures)?

Conflicts are real-life practice for empathy. Use short steps and simple words.

A quick “Stop, Feel, Help” script 

1. Stop the action: “Hands down. Safe body.”
2. Name feelings: “You look mad. You look sad.”
3. Say the problem: “Two friends want the same truck.”
4. Teach a helpful choice:
• “Ask for a turn.”
• “Trade.”
• “Use a timer.”
• “Find a second truck.”
5. Repair (make it better):
• “Can you help fix it?”
• “Can you bring ice?”
• “Can you say, ‘Are you okay?’”

Tip: Some children have big feelings because of #stress or trauma. They may need extra support to notice others’ feelings. This course is directly connected to empathy and trauma-sensitive care: Trauma-Sensitive Care: Supporting Young Children with Empathy

How can you include families so empathy grows at #home, too?

Families often want to help but may not know what to say. Share easy language they can use at home, like:

• “How do you feel?”
• “How do you think your friend felt?”
• “What can we do to help?”

A fun way to involve families is a kindness challenge. You can use this #free ChildCareEd resource with simple daily kindness ideas: 14 Days of Valentine Kindness

You can also send home “empathy moments,” like: 

• “Today Maya noticed her friend was sad and brought her a book.”
  These small notes build pride and repeat the behavior.

Where can you get more ideas and support from ChildCareEd?

For a related ChildCareEd article that connects emotional skills and empathy, read: Bursting the Ego Bubble: Creative ways of Developing Healthy Ego in Children

And if you like quick activity ideas, follow and share ChildCareEd on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@childcareed (Try one idea this week and tag us so we can cheer you on!)

Empathy is built one small moment at a time. When you model caring, name feelings, and coach children through real problems, you are helping them grow into kind, confident people.